Missed friend

I’ve made a point to staying away from this site because of the grief I feel. But I can’t stop thinking about it. About 3 years I met a woman on here that I deeply cared about. We were both in bad situations with relationships and shared a lot with each other . We had a lot in common and shared our lives with each other daily. We became very close with each other every day as time went by. We were both trapped in bad marriages and there seemed no logical explanation why we stayed with them. We were both falling in love with each other but we were a great distance apart and our relationship seemed doomed to our circumstances. I loved her but online relationships are very restricted and restraining. I didn’t think there was ever any chance of ever being together because of the circumstances we were both in. It was very hard for me but I started to just break things off because I thought it was best. But to my haste as I did cut it off, a friend on here told me she had passed away a couple months later from a lung embolism. I fell to my knees when I heard this.I just wish I would have had a chance to actually meet her in person before she died. There is not a day when I don’t think of her and wish I could have met her in person. Never take time for granted and pursue what your heart feels. I miss you honey. God bless you

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Richard65 · M

Years ago I struck up an online relationship with a woman in a terrible marriage with an abusive husband (I'm not married). We spoke online for over a year and I'd think about her a lot, even when we weren't online. We shared plenty. Eventually she kinda faded away, the messages became infrequent and eventually we lost touch. She briefly messaged again a year later, then ceased altogether.

At the time I felt it was a deep connection, but in hindsight I had no idea who she actually was. I realised I'd formed a relationship with a ghost, someone who might not have been who they said they were. It might even have been a man. I have no idea. People are very, very good at this, alt accounts, invented personas, catfishing. The abusive marriage might have been an invention designed to prevent us ever meeting. She might have been 100% genuine. I really dont know. Such online relationships are just how they appear in your head. You might be the subject of someone else's fantasies.

ArtieKat · M

@Richard65
[quote]in hindsight I had no idea who she actually was. I realised I'd formed a relationship with a ghost, someone who might not have been who they said they were. [/quote]
So true!

robingoodfellow · M

@Richard65 this is when the subject of catfishing turns dangerous. I really don't care what people do online with rp and fantasies, it's all very ' whatever' to me.
But messing with people [i]emotionally[/i] is a whole different thing. A catfish can do serious harm when they're building deep emotional connections with someone and then suddenly get bored with it and move on.
A lot of lonely people in the world looking for love. Playing with that for fun is way too cruel.

Richard65 · M

@robingoodfellow agreed, I'm an intelligent guy, but I realised I'd potentially allowed my own desire to influence my reaction to this person and it might all have been a sham. I wasn't damaged by it, but I could have been, under different circumstances.