Meaningless Title

I crave a love like the ocean.

Where passion and gentle coexist.

Love making that feels like losing our minds, and aftercare that feels soft and safe.

I've never experienced that.

What I usually go through is being the emotional caregiver. I'm responsible for the giving and keeping the flame burning. I let go of feeling safe because I know my participation isn't appreciated, it's used. I provide. The things I love and enjoy are secondary if they exist at all. They are never remembered.

I often feel empty afterwards and took that as something. At least I felt good for a little bit. That's all I can expect.

I don't know if I have ever been loved.

I know I have been the one giving, providing and holding on.

I am starved for someone to look in my eyes, touch my face, touch my body. I want to feel beautiful and fully desired by someone who remembers I even exist after they cum.

I just don't know if that exists.