Do you believe humans are polyamories? Is there anyone who doesn't have like 5 persons in mind rn?

@WhateverWorks yea i know 😬 but as a person who have been brutally hurt in love matter, i always fall short for it... I'm not in that scene anws. It's been 1.5 years since I took the road of celibacy, I'm doing too much yoga and workout, i think it's part of the process of kundalini rising, I'm so energetic, fire and angry most of the time. I'm discovering new aspects of me i never knew existed, i sometimes think why would one girl deserve me and not the other? It's just that there are many girls, i can see the road, it's a hard one... Trust me, working with fire to change is very hard. I'm aiming for 5 years, i sometimes think of suicide bcz of this road😢 but i like it bcz i never realized that I'm nothing without intimacy and relationships. I'm just curious to see where I'll be in 5 years, maybe more 🤑 my next aim now is to stop fantasizing about girls i know when i try to sleep. Learning how to keep the energy is hard after years of wasting it whenever i had the chance to💔

All I can tell you is that [i]a lot[/i] of people turn to poly as a trauma response. Poly does make it easier to avoid one’s issues than monogamy, but does not ‘fix those issues’ and inevitably the issues do surface / cause new problems for everyone involved. Rationalized selfishness, lies, fears of being alone type codependence, and fears of intimacy are rampant.

Also ‘deserve you’ type of unresolved ego stuff suggests poly would definitely not be a healthy fit. Healthy poly requires even more communication, consideration of others, complete integrity and diplomacy than monogamy. Anything less just hurts multiple people at a time instead of one at a time.


Perhaps casual dating is more of what you’re looking for? That requires transparency, but no singular investment.
@Hassan

@WhateverWorks rn I'm not looking for anything other than celibacy 💀 or at least trying to 😬 it's getting harder, I'm getting many love offers and i don't want it to distract me from my 5 years goal. But yea after these 5 years I'll see if the trauma that pushes me to polyamore is still there or I'll be into monogamy. I read that you can't heal relationships outside of relationships, what do u think?

Even if you’re not being sexual, casual dating does sound more of what you’re talking about. Poly is the careful maintenance of multiple relationships (though those multiple relationships can take all sorts of different shapes) , so even minus the physicality, what I said still applies.

[quote]I read that you can't heal relationships outside of relationships, what do u think?[/quote]
Will you elaborate more on this? I want make sure I’m understanding what you mean before I add my thoughts.

@Hassan

@WhateverWorks I'll be back in a bit, I'll send it in priv