I like to write

I wrote you this letter
Wish you would just call
But I ain't hear nothin
I don't get it at all
What'd I do
Was it somethin I said?
When I got on this path
Couldn't a guessed where it led
But here I am now
I'm riddled with doubt
My insides are screamin
Just let me out!
But I hold steady
To keep myself grounded
Upholdin these values
Wherein this land was founded
But it's gettin to me
And I just can't take it
She told me once alone
Just fake it til you make it
So I been doin just that
And I been doin just fine
But I gotta ask the question
Just one more time
How long do we fake it?
What if we ain't get made?
What does it even mean
That crossed my mind today
Is 30 too old to not know?
If so what am I missing?
Like am I being healed
Or am I just blissing?
Caught up in a dream
Like is this all real
What am I thinking
And how do I feel?
Is this for me
Or is this all for you?
Is this fascade false?
Or is it my truth?
Caught up in the moment
Caught up in you
Caught up with the fact
I ain't like to lose
Maybe it's perspective
Maybe I'm over reaching
Maybe I missed the lesson
That all y'all been teaching
Hold up it ain't over
This is far from being done
Put two and two together
This is only part one