Idk why im even upset atp

I mean, i wake up early everyday to do my stuff but smh its getting tiring
even tho i love doing everything i keep upseting myself over the smallest stuff
its as if nothing calms me down anymore
if i play ill get happy but after the first lose im almost crying my ass off LMFAOO or in school when i get 1 question wrong i feel like DISAPPEARING its even funny now that im writing it here but fr its tiring even tho im helping everyone i cant help myself or let others help me? i guess