I Fight Every Day To Find A Happier, Stress-free Me

I need to stop but I can't stop stressing, I need to stop I need to stop idk why I'm like this but I don't like it, I don't like it makes me lose my patients, I don't wanna be this person but I stress and stress and I can't sleep I can't breath right I'm walking in circles in my room I feel like I can trust but I don't get why I feel so stressed about it it scares me but I can't sleep and I hate this I don't get it I don't get it I don't get it, it really stresses me out so much I don't want to stress anymore but I can't stop caring too much its stupid I know but for sakes man I don't want to be this person I don't want to it makes me angry at myself because I can't calm down no matter what I try to do it sits and pokes the back of my mind, all I need is a confirmation but I stress and beat myself over something so minor I am thankful for my friends who are still with me even though I stress so much to the point where I need have a release I'm scared I'm gonna lose ppl cuz of this but I'm trying here I'm trying not to be that person, I'm restraining myself but sometimes I'm to late and the stress has came over me and just doesn't go away I'm thankful for real for you who I call my best friend and I'm sorry I'm like this but I'm here trying to calm myself down but idk how or what to do I don't know and I feel like such a freaking loser because of it. Its crazy to feel this but as much as I don't want to I do and I'm trying my best here but I can't stop I can't .. Idk what to do