I Procrastinate

I put off cleaning my closet for literal years. I hid in it here and there as a child and wasn't ready to unveil any forgotten memories.. though in hindsight I don't know what I was really expecting to find inside. At worst I was imagining skeletal remains of kittens, as my mom failed to spay one cat and she got out of the house and had a litter a few months later. Then her babies had babies... the whole situation became very overwhelming. The poor animals were constantly hungry as there were so many mouths to feed and my mom failed to feed my brother and I most days. It was by chance if she remembered/bothered/could afford to feed the cats

I know I would have smelled a rotting animal in my room, so I never really thought I would find bones inside, but the entire house smelled like rotting food for the majority of my life and at times I wondered if it would've been possible to miss

In the end I only found empty water bottles I had hidden from my mom that my dad brought to me in secret after dark, and blood soaked socks. I had three total loads of laundry to wash and I'm donating what I can. I found old jeans and t shirts.. I always felt bigger than I really was as I was so lanky and thin. But looking at my clothes I was rather small