Why does it feels like I'm going backwards?

I am not a fan of this healing process..why does is have to be so non linear? One minute I'm ok and the next, its like I'm back at square one.

Today, I keep hearing all the things she yelled at me when I last saw her and its truly debilitating. I keep wondering if she's moved on and happy with someone else. My mind is all over the freaking place.

I just miss her so dang much 😪