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rckt148 · 61-69, M
I have been on my own a very long time ,
supported not only myself and a family ,
I have helped many other families as well
took care of my Moms Dad until his death so he never was in a nursing home
3 yrs of taking care of my Dad until his death ,same as Grandpa no nursing home made sure he went to the doctor ,paid for his medication
took care of Mom 14 months ,,seen she was at her doctors appointments ,,had her meds ,at dialysis every other day for 5 yrs ,took on total care of her the last 14 months of her life ,,I did my best to be a good son
Helped raise my brothers,only one ever thanked me ,the one I least expected it from ,for never getting to be a kid ,always there to do for them and getting no praise ,no one know all I had to do ,but back then no one cared anyway ,
raised my kids and helped with theirs when the Dads turned out to be dead beats
I let my sister in laws girls move in at 16 and 17 ,,made sure they finished school as I had all my kids and one went on to college
Have run every machine you can imagine ,crossed the ocean more times then I remember myself and 2 other crew members all of us under 25 ,so we could save lives serve our country ,
Lost 2 great wives and lots of girlfriends ,back then I turned to drugs and Alcohol for me peace of mind ,I was a drunk and an addict from 13 -34
I have been the leader of many bands ,do a good one man show
built mansions all over the country ,,ran my own companies ,,
but I never took time to really know me or what was really important in my life until a few years ago
Would you believe me if I said ,I am here to know Christ ,and share who He is with others ?
I sure did waste a lot of time and my youth trying to find happiness ,
I had my world in my grasp since I was in my 20's but I didn't get it
my family has always been my world
being a good grandson ,a son ,a brother ,husband ,dad ,granddad now ,,and a loyal friend ,,
I was already what I wanted to be ,
but I had to loose it all and almost my life to get
Everything I needed was always right there ,Christ and my Family ,
and the God given talents ,that were given to Glorify God ,
but I was always working so hard so someone would be proud if me
turns out ,,Someone always was ,,it was me who wasn't
supported not only myself and a family ,
I have helped many other families as well
took care of my Moms Dad until his death so he never was in a nursing home
3 yrs of taking care of my Dad until his death ,same as Grandpa no nursing home made sure he went to the doctor ,paid for his medication
took care of Mom 14 months ,,seen she was at her doctors appointments ,,had her meds ,at dialysis every other day for 5 yrs ,took on total care of her the last 14 months of her life ,,I did my best to be a good son
Helped raise my brothers,only one ever thanked me ,the one I least expected it from ,for never getting to be a kid ,always there to do for them and getting no praise ,no one know all I had to do ,but back then no one cared anyway ,
raised my kids and helped with theirs when the Dads turned out to be dead beats
I let my sister in laws girls move in at 16 and 17 ,,made sure they finished school as I had all my kids and one went on to college
Have run every machine you can imagine ,crossed the ocean more times then I remember myself and 2 other crew members all of us under 25 ,so we could save lives serve our country ,
Lost 2 great wives and lots of girlfriends ,back then I turned to drugs and Alcohol for me peace of mind ,I was a drunk and an addict from 13 -34
I have been the leader of many bands ,do a good one man show
built mansions all over the country ,,ran my own companies ,,
but I never took time to really know me or what was really important in my life until a few years ago
Would you believe me if I said ,I am here to know Christ ,and share who He is with others ?
I sure did waste a lot of time and my youth trying to find happiness ,
I had my world in my grasp since I was in my 20's but I didn't get it
my family has always been my world
being a good grandson ,a son ,a brother ,husband ,dad ,granddad now ,,and a loyal friend ,,
I was already what I wanted to be ,
but I had to loose it all and almost my life to get
Everything I needed was always right there ,Christ and my Family ,
and the God given talents ,that were given to Glorify God ,
but I was always working so hard so someone would be proud if me
turns out ,,Someone always was ,,it was me who wasn't
Andromeda · 26-30, F
@rckt148: wow, you were a great version of yourself.. you've done so many good things for other people at least. I did nothing for nobody, not even myself. My life is a total mess. Nobody is proud of me. I have no talent, no sense of proportion, no hope.. I just like to turn into a stone for the rest of my life, I'm a waste of oxygen.
rckt148 · 61-69, M
@Andromeda: well I'm not going to heart all the negatives about yourself ,
but I will say my kids and I have all made more then our share of mistakes ,and lots of heartache and pain ,
I tried to steer all of them away from some of my pain ,trying to push them in directions to be successful ,but sadly most have to be about 30 to get it .
Now they listen so much my youngest wouldn't even date her man she has not unless I approved ,
I have gave my middle Daughter away twice ,her 1st husband ,my Grandkids from my youngest ,he was killed in a accident ,so we all know pain
but we all also have so much to be thankful for as well
So you have lots of time ,and I bet your parents are proud of you ,even when they are messing up parents are still proud of their babies ,
So miss waste of oxygen ,,not true
what do you like ?
I have taken girls who were dropouts who's Dad had to actually go to jail over their truancy ,got them to finish school ,and one go into nursing ,the other is the Mom of a beautiful child and now runs a walmart super center that over 100.000 people come through the doors of her store a day ,
both had been raped ,suffered from low self esteem ,both did drugs and heavy drinkers ,now they have decent lives ,,one is actually the mother of my 9 yr old son ,,but she sadly chose drugs over he and I ,but not even she is getting it together ,,She is pushing 40 ,but as I said ,,its not to late
You single ?
do you have your own place or still with your parents ?
Do you have a car ?
I have to run cook my boy something to eat ,but I'll check back in a bit ,
you have to like something ,what is it ?
but I will say my kids and I have all made more then our share of mistakes ,and lots of heartache and pain ,
I tried to steer all of them away from some of my pain ,trying to push them in directions to be successful ,but sadly most have to be about 30 to get it .
Now they listen so much my youngest wouldn't even date her man she has not unless I approved ,
I have gave my middle Daughter away twice ,her 1st husband ,my Grandkids from my youngest ,he was killed in a accident ,so we all know pain
but we all also have so much to be thankful for as well
So you have lots of time ,and I bet your parents are proud of you ,even when they are messing up parents are still proud of their babies ,
So miss waste of oxygen ,,not true
what do you like ?
I have taken girls who were dropouts who's Dad had to actually go to jail over their truancy ,got them to finish school ,and one go into nursing ,the other is the Mom of a beautiful child and now runs a walmart super center that over 100.000 people come through the doors of her store a day ,
both had been raped ,suffered from low self esteem ,both did drugs and heavy drinkers ,now they have decent lives ,,one is actually the mother of my 9 yr old son ,,but she sadly chose drugs over he and I ,but not even she is getting it together ,,She is pushing 40 ,but as I said ,,its not to late
You single ?
do you have your own place or still with your parents ?
Do you have a car ?
I have to run cook my boy something to eat ,but I'll check back in a bit ,
you have to like something ,what is it ?
Andromeda · 26-30, F
You know, I am thankful for everything I have. I have great parents, and a normal life without any controversy about basic things. Thank God I was never hungry, never been drunk, never used drug, nobody took advantages of me.. but something is missing, I don't like anything anymore. I used to write, play guitar, listen to music, read books, play chess, go to gym, do silly things with my friends and laugh alot. I used to like astronomy but I didn't use my telescope for the past 2 years, I didn't even look at the sky. I used to get straight A, but I don't care anymore. I mean, what's the point?
I'm single. I'm still with my parents but I will move in 3 months for college. I don't have a car, I don't really need one, and I've done nothing in my entire life, why would my parents be proud of me?
I'm single. I'm still with my parents but I will move in 3 months for college. I don't have a car, I don't really need one, and I've done nothing in my entire life, why would my parents be proud of me?
rckt148 · 61-69, M
you can play a guitar ?
can you sing ?
what are you going to college for ?
and a star gazer ( my brother keeps saying he see's orbs going in and out of the atmosphere and a Nibiru Planet X The Awakening ,maybe you can peek and I can tell him my friends looked and its not coming and I am not kidding about that
but I play Guitar and sing ,write songs .
what kind of music do you like ,,
I am trying to get my Granddaughter to sing the female part of this song
https://youtu.be/GzT4p-OaJ5c
anyway ,you sound like you got a plan you are just in a rut ,
but you got time ,I know some who figure it out in their 20's
but seems like 30 is the magic number for really getting it
I started earlier then most people I know ,
but I missed that 30 mark ,,I had major back surgery on my 30th birthday ,,
so a major reset
My Grandson has only been playing guitar a couple months ,
tomorrow he is going to play for a family function with me and do about 6 songs he has down pretty good ,
maybe if we get a good recording ,I'll share it with you if you like .
any way got to sleep ,we have to practice early
have a blessed one
can you sing ?
what are you going to college for ?
and a star gazer ( my brother keeps saying he see's orbs going in and out of the atmosphere and a Nibiru Planet X The Awakening ,maybe you can peek and I can tell him my friends looked and its not coming and I am not kidding about that
but I play Guitar and sing ,write songs .
what kind of music do you like ,,
I am trying to get my Granddaughter to sing the female part of this song
https://youtu.be/GzT4p-OaJ5c
anyway ,you sound like you got a plan you are just in a rut ,
but you got time ,I know some who figure it out in their 20's
but seems like 30 is the magic number for really getting it
I started earlier then most people I know ,
but I missed that 30 mark ,,I had major back surgery on my 30th birthday ,,
so a major reset
My Grandson has only been playing guitar a couple months ,
tomorrow he is going to play for a family function with me and do about 6 songs he has down pretty good ,
maybe if we get a good recording ,I'll share it with you if you like .
any way got to sleep ,we have to practice early
have a blessed one
Andromeda · 26-30, F
I can sing, but it could be better. I'm not taking my classes anymore though.
All I care about music is good lyrics and exciting rhythm, kind is not that important for me.
Computer engineering.
I had plan, but now, I just don't see any future for myself, there is no point in doing all of these things.
All I care about music is good lyrics and exciting rhythm, kind is not that important for me.
Computer engineering.
I had plan, but now, I just don't see any future for myself, there is no point in doing all of these things.