End of one's tether

Somehow that saying crept into my head just now. Everything is in free fall, well, that's how it's feeling to me. Personally, I'm also somewhat more than less stable.

Nothing in my life sounds really promising right now. I can't will myself to do anything at all right now. There's kindness and love that's somehow still out there but isn't right with me now.

People start walking ahead of me stopping me in my tracks. It's like constant humiliation, day in day out. Why are people seeing less the other? Why can they begetting so cruel these days?

I've done with much talking. Everything seems to be so overpowering. Not that I can't go on yet, but the fear is there. I've change over even here like the farmer's plow, hoping the mud will come off.

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dubkebab · 56-60, M

It can be a cruel world,or rather the people in it can be...hopefully this is just a phase for you and you can pull out of it soon. I find meaning in doing small acts of kindness and random generosity and taking time to appreciate nature. From what I've read you're no dummy and can find ways to nourish a stronger sense of balance in your life. Good luck. I know how it feels to be stretched to a breaking point.There's always hope.

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GeretJan

@dubkebab Yes, you hit the ball there. But it's even more complicated for me. My last therapist walked away. The one before just didn't take it serious. I'm bascially kept hostage by my emotions and circumstance. Love needs to be a two way street. That I know, and I'll see how that ends up yet again. I don't carry much hope. Money is a bad influence in the mix too. That and the past. Plenty of people can't work to their fullest because of trauma and hurt from past events.

dubkebab · 56-60, M

@GeretJan Truth. Maybe a change in surroundings would do you good?
(Says the guy who has not strayed very far from his small town in many years...)
Sorry your therapy journey was whacked. Ouch. I finally found a good one. Non-judgemental.

GeretJan

@dubkebab Thank you for your kindness and possitive example. I'm not going anywhere myself either just now. Still have a father to look after. That's another part of my sadness. No, I don't dare even approach anyone new now. Moreover, the fight is out of me, and that's the honest truth. I can't yet again tell everything to someone for it not to be taken serious. I've given everyone the most of myself that I can give. Lets see where it runs.

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