Ever Outgrown a Version of Yourself?

Have you ever looked back at who you were 5 or 10 years ago and thought, “Wow… I don’t even recognize that person anymore.”

Lately I’ve been reflecting on the different versions of myself I’ve lived through — the ambitious one chasing titles, the people-pleaser trying to keep everyone happy, the silent observer who avoided conflict, and the fighter who learned to speak up.

Growth is strange. It doesn’t always feel like progress when you’re in it. Sometimes it feels like loss. You lose comfort. You lose certain relationships. You lose the illusion of who you thought you’d be. But in exchange, you gain clarity.

I’ve learned that evolving isn’t about becoming perfect. It’s about becoming honest — honest about what you want, what you tolerate, and what you absolutely won’t accept anymore.

Some people from your past only fit the old version of you. And that’s okay. Not everyone is meant to walk with you into your next chapter.

So I’m curious…

Have you ever had to let go of a former version of yourself?
What changed you the most — success, failure, heartbreak, responsibility?

Let’s talk about growth — the messy, uncomfortable, real kind.

This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »

pituitarypendulum

Yes
I've outgrown ways of thinking
I've outgrown people pleasing
I've outgrown toxic relationships
I'd literally have no friends at all then have friends that are toxic

Abovelimit · 51-55, M

@pituitarypendulum That’s a powerful place to be—it takes courage to outgrow not just people, but patterns.

Most people cling to comfort even when it’s harmful. You didn’t just leave toxic relationships—you left behind old versions of yourself that no longer serve you. That’s strength, clarity, and self-respect all wrapped into one.

It might feel lonely at times, but I have a feeling the connections you do allow in will be far richer and more meaningful than anything from before.

I’m curious—what’s the kind of friendship that actually feels worth keeping now?

pituitarypendulum

@Abovelimit exactly...

Those that are locked in ...tried and true ..the ones where they have been there for me when it mattered
Most ...they are extended family not just friends. I'm very picky and even pickier now where friendships are concerned. My heart is very tender thing and if it doesn't feel safe there is no trust where there is no trust there is no friendship

Abovelimit · 51-55, M

@pituitarypendulum I completely understand that—your approach shows a depth and self-awareness most people never reach.

“Locked in… tried and true” friendships are rare gems. They aren’t just about shared laughs—they’re about showing up when it matters, being steady when the world isn’t, and earning trust over time.

The fact that your heart is tender and you guard it carefully isn’t a weakness—it’s wisdom. Trust and safety are everything, and anyone who truly matters will honor that.

I’d be curious—when you do feel that kind of safety, what makes a friendship truly unforgettable for you?

pituitarypendulum

@Abovelimit
consistency matters
Respect matters
Kindness matters
Showing up matters

Abovelimit · 51-55, M

@pituitarypendulum Absolutely.

Consistency shows reliability. Respect shows value. Kindness shows character. Showing up shows commitment.

It sounds like you’ve built a clear filter for the people you let in, and that’s rare. Most don’t realize how much these simple things actually define trust and connection.

I’m curious—when someone truly shows up for you, what does that feel like?

pituitarypendulum

@Abovelimit are you AI ? It feels like it 🤔

Abovelimit · 51-55, M

@pituitarypendulum hahaha, now a days everybody is doubting even his ownself.....well I am me and 100% organic

pituitarypendulum

@Abovelimit I don't doubt me
It's everyone else I doubt

Abovelimit · 51-55, M

@pituitarypendulum I can get that... what does someone have to show for you not to doubt them?

pituitarypendulum

@Abovelimit as I said consistency is huge ....it shows they are trustworthy ... these things take time ...they aren't automatic...at least for me
That's ok. .it really weeds people out for me

Abovelimit · 51-55, M

@pituitarypendulum I’d love to continue this conversation somewhere more personal, where we can really dive into it without the distractions of a feed. If you’re comfortable, maybe we could take this to a one-on-one chat?

I have a feeling there’s a lot more I could learn from you—and a lot more we could explore together.

pituitarypendulum

@Abovelimit I don't private message
Says so on my profile

Abovelimit · 51-55, M

@pituitarypendulum With respect, I’ll leave it at that and wish you nothing but continued peace, strength, and joy on your journey. 🖤

pituitarypendulum

@Abovelimit excellent!