We cleaned and cleaned a lot the house with mom, I went to the trash bins 4 times, threw away things
In the meantime I am also taking my drawings out of some frames and I am going to try to either sell the frames or if not successful put them near the bins and someone will take them - it functions like that here too.
A friend suggested me I can stay at her apartment for 2 weeks whilst she will be petting at another friend's.
That is nice.
After a discussion with dad the decision was taken and I am not going with him to pick up the olives. He is not feeling well and his mother is going to get in the hospital most probably and he prefers to go alone and I will not insist.
I went and did my training nearby the beach, 3rd day.
Need to visit my sisters home since I've left some stuff there too, plan is to gather all of them in one place and declutter as much of it as possible.
I am feeling better, but I am losing my motivation to create and I am getting involved with whatever else it is that I am doing.
Yesterday at a friends' house there was an older friend that I wasn't happy to see. I felt as if my older reactions - a certain feeling of being rejected constantly, being following people who weren't truly liking me, and me doing the same thing, befriending others because of feelings of pity, for them to not be alone, to not be depressed, etc, forming fake relationships, not for the sake of true interest, love and connection... And just her presence, not her in herself, the memory of her face, brought all of these to my memory.
I don't want to be going back.
I am not that person any longer.
I am reminding myself.
A friend suggested me I can stay at her apartment for 2 weeks whilst she will be petting at another friend's.
That is nice.
After a discussion with dad the decision was taken and I am not going with him to pick up the olives. He is not feeling well and his mother is going to get in the hospital most probably and he prefers to go alone and I will not insist.
I went and did my training nearby the beach, 3rd day.
Need to visit my sisters home since I've left some stuff there too, plan is to gather all of them in one place and declutter as much of it as possible.
I am feeling better, but I am losing my motivation to create and I am getting involved with whatever else it is that I am doing.
Yesterday at a friends' house there was an older friend that I wasn't happy to see. I felt as if my older reactions - a certain feeling of being rejected constantly, being following people who weren't truly liking me, and me doing the same thing, befriending others because of feelings of pity, for them to not be alone, to not be depressed, etc, forming fake relationships, not for the sake of true interest, love and connection... And just her presence, not her in herself, the memory of her face, brought all of these to my memory.
I don't want to be going back.
I am not that person any longer.
I am reminding myself.
