people in all forms, be it our bodies and bones, our hearts, or our souls are all malleable. we can heal after breaks.
but going back to pretending you're fine (in my opinion) is not a good thing.
imagine being in a bad relationship and being hurt that you cant go on pretending. isnt that a good thing? you broke out of a hellish pattern that you kept trying to convince yourself was ok....(not good, but at least ok) but if it was ok then why did it cause the break?
a lifetime of frustration and annoyance and anger and rage, an apathy and a million other contradictory things have all bubbled up. drained because everything of you has spilled out.
the logical part of our minds says stuff like, heal, try to do better, lets clean up the mess that is us.
but why? if all of me spills out on the floor like shattered glass, and i want to try and salvage the only identity ive ever had, then were left to pick up a lot of not great pieces, here's a shard that says loneliness, trust issues, heartbreak, unhealed trauma. etc.
who of any mindset would want to shove those pieces back in? and throwing things away isn't easy otherwise therapy would be one big trash can where we go once, chuck our damage in and walk away.
if feels like a personal language because nobody understands, they hear the words but how they put them together is wrong. what's not frustrating about that? the world nowadays keeps telling people to share and talk and safe spaces.....if nobody understands what you are saying then its no different from anywhere else.
from there you can find comfort in art, in music, in escapism. you've probably spoken and typed till you were exhausted trying to share/express to people. then in one painting or a 4 minute song you can feel that everything inside you is expressed right there, you don't know if you like it because you can understand it, or because you feel it understands you.
art in all forms is art because its MORE, feelings and emotions that a conversation couldn't do justice.
I'm guessing you like or connect to those pictures. girl on empty train and sad girl on bed.
reading those two descriptions is NOTHING compared to seeing them, really understanding.
id say you are feeling those kinds of emotions, BIG ones, ones that don't fit into just simple words.
or equally possible i am wrong, the rant and ramble i went on is my foreign language spoken only by me, and even then its a mess to try and speak (hence the long winded reply.....sorry)
