How do you distinguish that it is unbending intent which you are cultivating and not building your personal trap/ loop ?

Find what your deepest motivator is, and you'll find your answer.
Beware of the tricks of the mind, which will try its hardest for you not to get to the reality.

I think we know deep down. But when I’m unsure I always consult with my pendulum and get good advice and answers that way

If you are after what once was bad for you and you suddenly need I imagine that's how this kind of personal trap happens

When you get to the end and it's the same starting point

Only time will tell.