My mother taught me that ‘nice people’ can still be manipulative and parasitic

A pattern of expecting everyone else to bail you out of predicaments you get yourself into, regardless of whatever reasoning you might have, isn’t ‘nice’.

Crying people sob stories until you get what you want isn’t ‘nice’.

Habitually making empty promises and excuses isn’t ‘nice’.

Ever reeling in the next person, unaware of your patterns, to save you isn’t ‘nice’.

Ignoring other people’s boundaries because you want something then guilting/shaming them with some sad story to justify why their healthy boundaries are less important than what you want isn’t ‘nice’.

Similarly, justifying why you ignored their healthy boundaries by using flattery also is sh!tty..

Expecting other people to endure your self-destructive or destructive issues or they don’t love you/aren’t a good friend/good daughter/good sister etc isn’t ‘nice’.

An ongoing pattern of self-destructive behavior that requires constant attention and validation from the people in your life isn’t ‘nice’.

Demonizing the world and everyone else who doesn’t enable this behavior, ever painting yourself as the victim isn’t ‘nice’.

Acting like a kicked puppy whenever it gets pointed out that it’s time for you to be personally responsible for your own life and the consequences of your own choices isn’t ‘nice’.