We all make our choices —- then live with them, and.. go on living with ourselves
I’m the one that got away to a few people and I can tell you that it’s not about me.
I’m just their ‘what if’. I’m just the wisp of a life that could have turned out differently for them if they’d had sooner realizations and made different choices. I don’t wonder about stuff like that I think because my circumstances have had me adamantly focused on metamorphosis. Several cocoons later, I am not that girl anymore who wanted ’that life’ I could have shared with then back then.
what I’m doing and want to be doing has changed.. and I’m good. I do love my partner, but in this moment what I’m writing about has more to do with how important it is to choose your life rather than let life happen to you.
Whether people choose to make excuses or take responsibility, by 30s, definitely 40s we’re mostly living with the weight of our choices day in, day out.
It’s a bitter pill realizing that many decisions we made in our 20s to early 30’s result in a lot of stuff you can’t undo.
—Many complicated situations where you realize you can’t have it all, so you have to choose what matters most.
Then.. hopefully make peace with that choice and create peace within yourself
OR … exist with the gnawing cognitive dissonance. That uncomfortable cognitive dissonance, “I want abc more than anything, but do xyz” happens when the actions speak for what matters most already, but that conflicts with the story we tell ourselves
about ourselves
and how we want other people to see us.
I’m just their ‘what if’. I’m just the wisp of a life that could have turned out differently for them if they’d had sooner realizations and made different choices. I don’t wonder about stuff like that I think because my circumstances have had me adamantly focused on metamorphosis. Several cocoons later, I am not that girl anymore who wanted ’that life’ I could have shared with then back then.
what I’m doing and want to be doing has changed.. and I’m good. I do love my partner, but in this moment what I’m writing about has more to do with how important it is to choose your life rather than let life happen to you.
Whether people choose to make excuses or take responsibility, by 30s, definitely 40s we’re mostly living with the weight of our choices day in, day out.
It’s a bitter pill realizing that many decisions we made in our 20s to early 30’s result in a lot of stuff you can’t undo.
—Many complicated situations where you realize you can’t have it all, so you have to choose what matters most.
Then.. hopefully make peace with that choice and create peace within yourself
OR … exist with the gnawing cognitive dissonance. That uncomfortable cognitive dissonance, “I want abc more than anything, but do xyz” happens when the actions speak for what matters most already, but that conflicts with the story we tell ourselves
about ourselves
and how we want other people to see us.
36-40
