Ah I'm having one of my dips again

Having a moment of hopelessness. Things look up but when the reality gets close I'm just so used to things going badly that I don't have confidence in myself now. I feel really sad, I feel like if it kept up like this for the rest of the year I'd actually kill myself. I don't wanna live in this world if I can't even participate in it.

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WaryWitchWandering · 36-40, F

I’ve been there. Please realize killing yourself isn’t a guarantee of “peace”. You won’t be “you” to experience it. Plus nobody knows for sure what the fuck happens in the end.

Why not just stick around and see where life goes? If you got nothing to lose either way, might as well right?

Ryannnnnn · 31-35, M

@WaryWitchWandering I've already been there as well, I tried when I was 22 or 23. This is what makes it hurt so much. I've tried so hard. I just need something to go right for me for once. I put in every effort and I get rejection in return, there's only so much I can take even with support systems.

WaryWitchWandering · 36-40, F

@Ryannnnnn are there places you can go that bring you peace? Is there something you are passionate about (or used to be passionate about?)

Ryannnnnn · 31-35, M

@WaryWitchWandering It's hard to be passionate about things when I'm struggling. I'll feel better tomorrow but i'm scared for this job interview because I feel like I might slip into a really dark place and I don't wanna live like that again.

Ryannnnnn · 31-35, M

@WaryWitchWandering I feel like I either get the job or I go off the rails. I'm probably wrong and just saying that out of stress and sadness, I always pull myself through and find a way to laugh but I have my moments as well.

WaryWitchWandering · 36-40, F

@Ryannnnnn we all have our “moments”

The lows suck (boy do I know it), but when you push through there is more to see you know?

You’re worth it.

Ryannnnnn · 31-35, M

@WaryWitchWandering Yeah. Thanks I appreciate it

WaryWitchWandering · 36-40, F

@Ryannnnnn and one job isn’t the end all be all.

But I’ve got my fingers and toes crossed for you regardless

Ryannnnnn · 31-35, M

@WaryWitchWandering Thanks you're a sweetheart. Aye I just need a win. I'm gonna turn it to anger and lift weights or something. But first I'm gonna eat icecream 🤣