Feeling better yesterday and today. Testing out this ‘have faith’ thing
So many times I’ve tried to talk myself out of being an atheist and I just can’t do it. 🤷🏻♀️😅
It’s tough because there’s no concept of a ‘greater than you’ influence to find reassurance in when the odds are stacked against you. There’s causation and consequences. There’s just you, your internal and external resources, whatever support system you have, and a role of the dice — Possibility and plausibility.
Sometimes I forget how much is possible though.
Sometimes I forget there are a lot of things happening or about to happen that are beyond my awareness. In some ways that resembles spirituality —- finding solace in the acceptance that I don’t know everything —- that something I don’t know might be about to happen, — and that something might be what I need/want, or at least assist in me continuing in the general direction of what I need/want.
‘Faith’ that more is possible. plausible, happening, doable than I am aware of. Or maybe that’s just a kind of humility?
So… I keep checking my e-mail.. 2 houses show up that could fit into what we narrowly need/want and can afford.. we looked at a couple yesterday. They’re not stellar like that massive, retro house, but just having any options helps the Sisyphus feelings.
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SW-User
Too much thinking, webs of thoughts. You will never talk yourself out of being an atheist, so many times failed and you can not do it. The devil won’t let us, only help us with that getting trapped in all those thoughts. Only GOD can do it cause only He is stronger then devil. The more you depend on yourself and fo it by yourself (without God) the more you will get disappointed and fail. You have to give up SELF/ego....literally into God’s hands. “There is no God , only you” is the devils best lie and the thoughts are his best tactics. The devil doesn’t have to do anything at all...only “offer” thoughts literally “put them in your head” which get our natural ego going/working and boom we do his job ourselves for him, believing there is no God. I went through this in the beginning of coming to Christianity. But I WANTED to come to God, so I did what He said not what my thoughts in my head dictated. We don’t own our thought process...
