Sad
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I haven’t taken my own life yet

But the pain is unbearable I can’t still and it feels like my heart is going to burst open it is physically unbearable
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elafina · 36-40, F
Difficult times... it's like a draining energy spiral that you can't see out of it.
Try to get therapy. I read sth you just wrote about beyond repair... nothing is beyond repair... maybe you are different, but don't think of it in the terms of repairing as it might be irrelevant. Yes, irrelevant.
Find the type of therapy that fits your style. Sunbathing, Art therapy, Psychotherapy, Aromatherapy, Massage, Religion. My favourite is nature. You just go to nature. You don't have to do anything, just stay there for as long as you can and it will cure you. You just need to go there.