I told her I was going to bed

But really I was going to mope, maybe vomit, and perhaps if I'm lucky cry myself to sleep.

or I might pass out now. Either way I don't want her to worry, most of the time she's one of the few that I know truly cares. I just can't hurt her, she's one of the reasons I still draw breath.... I would hate to leave that scar on her. I couldn't call myself her sister then...