A feeling of

A calm excitement fills me whenever I think about the life ahead of me and how I want to make it
Shape it
Fabricate it
Go through it
Simply live it
A feeling similar to bittersweetness -
A word I use way too often
Similar but not so quite to overwhelm
A feeling foreign to me
And the fact of it being foreign and new to me makes the feeling even stronger since
As I think these things I get this sense of ME, GAIA, of self consciousness, self awareness
It is that feeling which develops into one resembling bittersweetness
Of wanting to cry not from happiness but not too far off
Of what I imagine a parent feels when they look at their child
Grow up
Change
Dance
But only a fraction of what I imagine this feeling to be.
It's as if I'm looking down upon this girl, who is me
And I feel both the observer and the observed, the parent and the child
At once