I have suicidal ideations that come out as soon as a major aspect of my life is affected. I'm currently going through a stressful transition between jobs and I wont lie I walked home having a panic attack, sobbing and imagining myself going to jail and shooting heroin. Dont ask why, it is a thing I do when I am extremely stressed where my brain manifests entire scenarios of destruction that seem very realistic at the time
Every day. Throughout the day when I am upset or overwhelmed or feeling down, a thought about how I should not be alive will enter my head. The same thoughts pop up after minor inconveniences. I have also comforted myself with the thought that if things get bad enough, living is not my only option. This morning I just woke up with the thoughts.
I don't, I have briefly before and might again one day but normally not. I am sorry for the way you feel. I hope you are getting some help this in the the sort of thing you want to face alone.
Having known two people who have committed suicide, yes i dont want to be here most of the time but i would never put my family and friends through it. And i know that when you are in that state you arnt thinking of anyone else. Its an awful place to be from inside and out.
I hated it when I was depressed. Felt like that every day. Now I have some goals in life, and I'm working towards them. And I hope I'll always have new ones, that's what keeps me going 😊
@ihavenoone Thank you. I believe in you. If you ever need someone to talk with about anything, I'll listen 😊 and hear you out
SW-User
Be Strong and Courageous - you are more powerful than you know. A lot of us here have stood on that edge where you’re at and many of us are happy we stayed. It’s not fun, it’s so hard, I know. I’m sorry you know what this feels like.
SW-User
Try and get help those thoughts can consume you. it did for me currently in a mental health hospital after a near 4th suicide attempt. Please you are more amazing than you know you can beat this.