If you hate your government, and you leave to another country in other words, defect. Are you a traitor?

Are you a traitor if you hate the country?
Then, how do you show your patriotism if you despise the system?

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Not at all. The country of one’s birth is happenstance, and it may or may not be a place one wants to continue to live. You’re not obligated to remain where you’re unhappy. And you’re not a traitor unless, after having committed to a country, you actively work to undermine its government and people.