How would you feel if you found out your mother had video surveillance in your apartment?

As for my life today, I have two friends who know something about my mother, one who knew her from a distance in the 1950s, and one who never knew her and is glad of it. Recently, I told a close friend of over 50 years about my mother for the first time. He was shocked because I had never told him before. I have had a number of close long time friends with whom I have never discussed it or have only mentioned it superficially and briefly. I talked about it with a psychotherapist and it wasn't easy for many reasons including that I felt restricted knowing everything I said was likely being taped by my mother's people. Privacy has been an unknown component in my life though I believe I very probably have it in my little rented room today. Being able to post some of my experiences here has been a relief and very therapeutic.

Thank you, I have issues with my mum but after reading your experiences it all seems trivial..I don't know what to say but you're a really strong person for sure, anyone else in your place would have probably killed themselves

Maybe they were hoping I would; my mother suggested it once.

One frustration I have about posting here on this subject (besides knowing many will not believe me) is when people react as if I had your standard, more or less normal, mother problems. Drives me crazy when people respond that way.

I also wanted to mention I have a close friend of many years since early childhood who knew my mother quite well. But my friend was a chosen red diaper baby and may still be involved today (I really don't know, don't want to know). So I am fond of her but have learned to guard my speech with her. She has stated my mother was a "horrible person" but she becomes angry if I try to discuss particular incidents or speculations.