I Hate Child Abuse

When a kid gets in trouble and the parent hits them but says I do it because I love you or this hurts me more than it hurts you, I think that's a lie. I think they do it because they are angry.

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Sarahbellas

I think anger is maybe a part of it. I also think it has to do with them feeling like they are failing...they aren't in control the way they want things to be...so they smack the person to get them to stop and listen...and exert a sense of authority and power over the other person. If they continue to hit the person over and over, it's either more of the same...they aren't getting what they want out of the kid, or maybe because that is how they think it is supposed to be dealt with...and its a punishment, because now it's the kids fault...and you want the kid to feel how you feel in the most dramatic and direct course...which might take the form of more hitting...or other stuff. at least that is how I often see it. Typically the person is overwhelmed enough with emotion and stress that they can't see another way to deal with the problem. It's a default mode.
I do think you are right that the I love you's and such are lies. They aren't doing it for the child's benefit, because its the best choice out there...they are doing it for their benefit...because it's an easy choice to choose to hurt someone to try and right the world rather then to build a world and build up a person into a place worth living.