Any Christians out there willing to pray for me?
I feel so numb inside. I think about walking into the middle of the street and being hit by a car. I think about killing myself 24/7. I dont know what is wrong with me. I just need to break down
Really break down.
The kind where you ugly cry into someone's arms. The kind where you fall to the floor trying to catch your breath but you can't because your heart is beating too fast.
But every time I feel like my head is going to explode, I don't break down. I take a deep breath and I tell myself to suck it up because there are people dying out there in this dark abyss we call home. I tell myself that I don't deserve to feel the way I do. Because i'm one of the lucky ones. I've had a pretty good life. But I still have my own demons that I fight every second of the day.
I force a smile and hold back the tears because I know i'm better than this. But I feel like i'm a ticking time bomb ready to combust into flames. I just feel like my heart is hanging by a thread like my oxygen is running out. I just feel this weight over my shoulders that just keeps weighing me down. Yet I can't form whats wrong into words. Because I don't know, I feel like I'm insane. Like my mind is attacking itself.
I just need someone to listen to my tears and be there.
Someone who gets my crazy messed up thoughts. Someone who can just say it's okay, just let it out, i'm right here. Your not alone and your not crazy. You are just human. ❤️
Really break down.
The kind where you ugly cry into someone's arms. The kind where you fall to the floor trying to catch your breath but you can't because your heart is beating too fast.
But every time I feel like my head is going to explode, I don't break down. I take a deep breath and I tell myself to suck it up because there are people dying out there in this dark abyss we call home. I tell myself that I don't deserve to feel the way I do. Because i'm one of the lucky ones. I've had a pretty good life. But I still have my own demons that I fight every second of the day.
I force a smile and hold back the tears because I know i'm better than this. But I feel like i'm a ticking time bomb ready to combust into flames. I just feel like my heart is hanging by a thread like my oxygen is running out. I just feel this weight over my shoulders that just keeps weighing me down. Yet I can't form whats wrong into words. Because I don't know, I feel like I'm insane. Like my mind is attacking itself.
I just need someone to listen to my tears and be there.
Someone who gets my crazy messed up thoughts. Someone who can just say it's okay, just let it out, i'm right here. Your not alone and your not crazy. You are just human. ❤️
