Menopause & expectations

I need to know first hand experience about menopause. Would appreciate serious responses focusing on what the ones' going through it expect from their husbands or partners?

This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »

SW-User

Every woman is different, so I imagine that their symptoms and reactions to their symptoms vary widely. I can tell you that it is hell on the woman and I'm sure it is on her spouse. From the woman's point of view, it can feel like she is out of control of her own body, brain, emotions, hormones...everything. There are endless nights of ZERO sleep despite utter exhaustion and sleep aids. The brain will NOT shut down, it is constantly racing. There are night sweats, hot flashes, then feeling freezing cold, starving but nauseated, sudden weight gain/loss, sad/angry/irritable/anxious for no reason, or for every reason under the sun, increased sex drive to the point that you want to jump every man in sight and then ZERO sex drive....and I mean ZERO. These are just some of the things that can happen, all in one day, or all in one hour....It is a vicious cycle and it's day in and day out.

xbandoleerx · 56-60, M

Thank you very much for such a positive n focused effort.

SW-User

@xbandoleerx: As far as what women expect from their partners, I'm sure that's different too. However, I think reassurance of their love, patience, and understanding is helpful. As bad as it is for the women, I honestly feel badly for the men as well, lol. It isn't easy to deal with those who struggle in the ways I've mentioned. Good luck!

xbandoleerx · 56-60, M

Does the age of its onset also vary?can it effect blood pressure and blood sugar levels too?

SW-User

@xbandoleerx: Yes, the age varies and women can have lots of those same symptoms I mentioned in pre-menopause. I believe it can effect both of those, but I'd have to look it up to be positive.

xbandoleerx · 56-60, M

@Lakesidepoet: see the issue is unless one is sure of the impending change taking place which means being aware, one can mishandle a female going through this major change n compound her problems and handicap her abilities to cope with this major change in her life.
You have covered the issue very logically and sensibly. Thank you!

SW-User

@xbandoleerx: You are exactly right. That can also be a vicious cycle. She feels out of control in everything and just plain feels like....crap, she starts acting "irrationally," hubby reacts in anger, now she's out of control AND unloved/unwanted....doesn't he see how she's suffering? She lashes out in her hurt/anger....he's thinking where did my wife go and who is this psycho? Did I really sign up for this? round and round it goes.....

xbandoleerx · 56-60, M

@Lakesidepoet: this is exactly what I fear, to hurt a person who is already going through pain n confusion

SW-User

@xbandoleerx: Honestly, the fact that you are worried about it, puts you leaps and bounds ahead of most of the men I know.

xbandoleerx · 56-60, M

@Lakesidepoet: a woman who has been through thick and thin and shared the ups and downs and clung to you, what do you think she deserves?

SW-User

@xbandoleerx: All the love and understanding you can give her. 🙂

xbandoleerx · 56-60, M

@Lakesidepoet: can't agree more 👍