Adult women help needed with this plz?

My little bro is 11. He was put in this group home bcuz of anger problems. He can be tough. I went by today to go get him for a couple hours outing he had earned. As I was walking in I heard him yelling. There was this female staff(I found out her name is Tory and she's a special education teachers aide they said, cuz they have their own classes there)and she's like maybe 23 or 24 just guessing. She's deff bigger than my bro cuz she's like about 5'5 n maybe like 150 n that's a lot bigger than him. She got his hands behind him and held them behind his lower back. He was tryna fight n somehow she got him falling forward on the carpet till he laid on his belly. She was holding his hands behind him still. Before he could do anything she put 1 leg over him and kinda got in position with 1 leg on each side all the way up against him and sat all the way down on his upper legs. I was just standing there watching n he didn't see me yet. When she did that he was like uhhh! Like he was shocked. That was when he tried to push her booty off for a second but she never moved. He yelled. He stopped for a second n laid his head sideways n that's when he saw me. He started begging me for help to get her off. I looked at her n she had a serious look but didn't look like she was rly worried about him. I didn't know what to do so I sorta just looked at him n was like....push her off! That's when he got serious n went unnhh!😖😖😖n tried to push her booty off him again. She didn't move at all. I told him out loud....her legs! So he goes unnhh! Again and tries to push her legs out. Those didn't move. He was all whining I can't!😩😩😩 He couldn't free his hands either. He started begging her to get off but she just kept sitting. That's when he just gave up n lied there still started crying rly hard for like 10 mins. After she got off him he yelled that I shoulda done something. He's mad at me but what could I have done? I told him what to try but it just doesn't work on Tory. What could I have done to help him?😕

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sree251 · 41-45, M

Good post. I am not a woman but I would say you did right by your brother. The female staff did what she had to do. She didn't hurt your brother but just restrained him as best she could.

You write well, Xanders. You gave a clear account of what happened and it was an interesting read. Good job.

Roadsterrider · 56-60, M

Are they trying to resolve the anger issues or just trying to control him as he goes through the system? I had some anger issues when younger and thank God I got help and got those issues under control before going to jail or somebody hurting me badly. Sooner or later anger will get a person into some trouble they can't get out of. Not knowing what preceded the teacher restraining him, it is hard to tell if it was necessary or not. My son would get angry and at one point, I was away from home, he was going off the deep end, self-harm was a real possibility. My wife called the police at my request, he spent the night in jail. That was the beginning of healing for him. He was assigned a counselor, he talked about his problems until they were sorted out.

Jenny1234 · 51-55, F

I’m not really sure how you can interfere with that and I’m not sure if you’re supposed to either. I think if you did interfere, it could potentially give reason for them to remove him from that placement

Also did you ask her what he did for her to get on top of him like that?

They usually usually do that when the youth has aggressive outbursts so he must have had one just before you arrived

Penny · 46-50, F

Yes i agree you should have said something to try and diffuse the situation. And find out what happenned to cause that behavior from the aide. Cant judge til you know the situation.he might have deserved it. Maybe not though. You can ask him what he did or why.

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