I gained my weight back

No wonder I’m doing better this round. Each time after chemo the last couple times, I’d ended up in the hospital. I should have known because after the first round, I thought I was in the clear until a checkup when they’d weighed me, and I saw I’d dropped to 113. I got seriously sick and ended up in the hospital a couple days later, puking my guts out nonstop. I was 104 during the last hospital stay, and so worried that I’d go below 100 and how much worse my health would be if I reached that point.

Throughout my adult life, whenever I dropped below 118, my health tanked (or it was tanking and the weight loss was an indicator). I’m 119 now. I know this seems obsessive about weight, but mine’s been tied to so many moments of weakness and illness. To gain my weight back makes me feel hopeful. And as of Thursday, this will be the first round I made it through without ending up in the hospital. I’m getting stronger.