Overstimulated mom

I walked almost everywhere today, I got some bad news about having psoriasis on my scalp and I lost hair. I wanted to cry but I know it’s because iv been more stressed and financially unstable . Plus iv been having health issues like a wart on my heel that’s making it hard to walk.. I can’t even afford the medicine to keep up with my health because my insurance doesn’t cover shit.. My son doesn’t stay still and is always touching and putting everything in his mouth and it’s all too much to give him attention and pay attention to my health while being so exhausted ,not having a break or any help . Then having to maintain a safe clean environment . I been depressed eating junk food and now I have to go full vegan to help with my breakouts or I will kill over. I’m so scared because I lack so much I don’t have anything but luckily taxes will be coming soon godwilligly while I’m in school. I just pray god watches over me and May any I’llnesses leave my body because I can’t afford to die or have anyone watch my son and I don’t wanna live off ssi . I’m so depressed I don’t have time for myself to even take care of myself. I love my son but I wish I made better decisions. I’m in such a horrible predicament especially with inflation and having no help thinking his dad would help I’m so dumb I hate my brain I hate everything about me

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Graylight · 51-55, F Best Comment

STOP. Breathe. Breathe again, 3 seconds in, 5 seconds out. Feel the air moving in your lungs and oxygenating your head. Relax and breathe one more time.

Now...you've got a lot going on, anyone can see that. Right now, I'm guessing it seems like a garage just packed full of stuff you can't even identify. We have to get through that mess. But here's the good part: It's one tiny step at a time.

If I'm right, these are some issues you're having.

Poor finances and inadequate health insurance
Some physical pains
An active, curious son
Managing your environment
changing your eating patterns

Let's start with that, with naming some issues and taking away their monstrous power. Often, physical symptoms, conditions and pains are the reflection of the struggles in your head and heart. You may well find that with reduced stress things like psoriasis and acnes, even aches and pains, diminish. The best way to effect that right now is to do anything you've been asked by a professional and take 5 minutes to yourself each day. On the bed, on the toilet, in a closet, out on the sidewalk - take 5 minutes to re-center your spin. Every day. No matter what. [And I'm not a medical professional, but duct tape faithfully placed over a plantars wart will reduce it over time by starving it of oxygen.]

Eating vegetarian or vegan is an opportunity to put quality nutrition into your body and it's easier than ever before. I'm sure plenty of people here would offer you some great tips and recipes. Make your bed and keep a clean home. Every day. Making a bed may do nothing for anyone else in the world, but it can represent a promise you made to yourself and kept, and it makes your environment more tolerable. Get through school. If you have to beg childcare, take out loans, live on less sleep...that education is like a sackful of diamonds; it will get you further and make you richer than anything else you can imagine and it will enhance your child's life. Money will be more plentiful and work benefits ease your healthcare needs in higher employment positions.

More than anything, you're doing everything you can and you're fighting like hell. That counts. If you're head's going below the surface, call out for help; others will come. You've made mistakes and you've had successes and your road will have been one worth walking for the destination you find. But you have to help yourself first. One hand for the ship, one hand for yourself.

But start with breathing and the knowledge you're not alone in the Universe. Hang in there.

Helfreclb · 26-30, F

@Graylight thank you so much I cried reading this because everyone can see it .. I really am trying to do my best.. I dont want to give up ever.. I appreciate everything you said and even with taking little steps at a time , I feel like im racing against time because of all the time I wasted.. I agree with also taking 5 minutes to myself and I will ! Thank you again I really needed to read this and I will keep it in my photos.. god bless you for taking the time to help someone in dire need

Graylight · 51-55, F

@Graylight A while back, people helped me. This is just paying it forward. Don't worry about wasted time; that's you carrying around one too many things. It's not the amount of time, it's the quality; you can be and do anything you set goals for.

There's a saying I love, and maybe you can use it until one day you wake up, say it and know it's true:
"Yesterday, the devil whispered in my ear, 'You're not strong enough to withstand the storm.'
Today, I whispered in the devil's ear: 'I am the storm.'"

And you are.