Do you respond to everyone who sends you private messages?

I get private messages from people I've never interacted with. I can see if we've talked in posts and stuff. But it seems weird to just get a private message out of the blue from someone I don't know.

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sarabee1995 · 26-30, F Best Comment

Oh god no! Private messages are for friends; for people with whom you've developed a relationship and some modicum of trust. They are not for random strangers.

I've made the analogy ever since the EP days that a PM from a stranger is like a stranger in a bar coming up to you and asking if he can chat with you in the dark back corner. Hell no! You wanna talk to me? Then sit up here at the bar with the lights over head and the people all around. Private chats are for people who've built that trust.

FaeLuna · 31-35, F

@sarabee1995 That is such a good analogy! I'm going to have to remember that one.

sarabee1995 · 26-30, F

@FaeLuna Yup. I use it all the time.

You wanna talk to me? No problem. Pull up a stool right here at the bar with my friends around and the lights on. You wanna take me down back so we can have a private chat?? Sorry dude, gotta get to know ya first. ;)

FaeLuna · 31-35, F

@sarabee1995 I could have avoided so many bad conversations if only I committed to actually doing this!

sarabee1995 · 26-30, F

@FaeLuna Well, if you do decide to stick to this and even to explain it to all the guys messaging you, be prepared for some strong responses. Some of these guys get so mad when you refuse private chats. They feel that their mere existence is enough for you to owe them your time. Just be careful (here and in real life).

sarabee1995 · 26-30, F

@FaeLuna Btw, just checked out your about me. Love it. I'm also from the northeast (Cape Cod), but living temporarily now down in Virginia. Lemme know if you need any help saving the world from the forces of evil! ;)

DreamyCrush · F

@FaeLuna Same here. I have unwittingly subjected myself to guys who want to tell me that they're horny, so I block them. If they have no more to say than "Hi" or they start out by asking you something personal about yourself just IGNORE.

FaeLuna · 31-35, F

@sarabee1995 Oh, there are times that I get some strong reactions if I take more than a few minutes to respond. I'm ready for them!

And I'll give you a call next time the world is in danger!

FaeLuna · 31-35, F

@DreamyCrush At least I've learned to ignore the messages that start out with "Hi." It's like they all follow the exact same script of awkward small talk and then immediately into the horny questions. Or worse, they ask me to come up with a topic. Like, no, that's not how it works. You messaged me, you figure out what you want to talk about.