I Am Not a Feminist

My own flesh and blood sister is the most unpleasant adult woman I have ever dealt with. The situation is even worse than I have let on.

Problems between us go back to the 1970s. In those heady days, she sowed her wild oats rather freely, which led to 3 abortions in 6 years. I know about them, because she took the initiative to tell me about them. I did not comment critically in any way, but I also did not reassure her that I agree with the pro-choice party line. I suspect that she deeply resents having confided in me in this fashion. Now I know too much. She probably suspects that I gossiped about her abortions, which I have not done.

My sister inherited every penny I did and completed a law degree. When she divorced, she got title to the family residence, and enough money to clear the remaining mortgage. But she is still struggling to pay a mortgage, on a house worth half of the one she lived in when she divorced. My sister is incompetent with money. I bet she is deeply envious that I am not. My brother keeps an eye on my mother's financial affairs, and recently discovered that our sister has abused her Power of Attorney to divert money from our mother's checking account to herself. We are waiting to hear from the lawyer of the trust company as to whether a complaint to the police is warranted.

Im sorry that you are having to go through this. It is sad to say the least. But not uncommon and not unexpected. Judging by her behavior she only cares for herself. Is she a feminist?

She is indeed a feminist but, happy to say, does no feminist agitation. She is not at all lesbian. Her main ideological stance is hating the GOP. She is quick to argue that others only think of themselves. I am sure that she has rationalised her embezzlements as needed to support herself so that she can look after our mother.

When I have pointed out this or that injustice I have experienced, women in recent years have told me on several occasions that "you only think of yourself" "It's all about Consa, isn't it?" No one would ever dare speak that way to a woman who had been the victim of violence or going through a difficult divorce.