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Joke: An atheist was walking through the woods

An atheist was walking through the woods. "What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!" he said to himself.

As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him.

He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him. He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was closing in on him.

He looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was even closer.

He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him,reaching for him with his left paw and raising his right paw to strike him.

At that instant the Atheist cried out, "Oh my God!"

Time stopped. The bear froze. The forest was silent.

As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky.

"You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident."

"Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?"

The atheist looked directly into the light, "It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian?"

"Very well," said the voice.

The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed.

And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head and spoke:

"Lord bless this food, which I am about to receive from thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen"
RoboChloe · 26-30, F
What a stupid atheist.

A smart atheist would have explained to God that "oh my God" is simply an exclamation of surprise that's so ingrained in the English language that its religious roots have become irrelevant to its use. And then, the atheist would have started to believe in God, because like any good atheist, their disbelief in God came only from a lack of evidence.

As I said. Stupid atheist.

There are other problems with this joke, but I'll let them slide since it was funny :)
CassandraFemale17 · 26-30, F
@RoboChloe: I didn't write the joke. I just used it.
RoboChloe · 26-30, F
@CassandraFemale17: I was critiquing the joke, not you. :)
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CassandraFemale17 · 26-30, F
@LornaTime: lol
LoveChild · 26-30, F
It's a good joke, but someone posted it a few weeks ago.
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That gave me paws for thought😂
MikefromEP · 51-55, M
Soooo bad lol
skier080 · 22-25, M
OzDiver · 61-69, M

 
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