Most of my life has been about survival

Surviving alone. Learning on my own being there for myself that's how it's been for me.I'm a broken man whose lost much and who has made sacrifices for people who don't deserve shit from me. All because of the slimmer of goodness in me which is ruining my life. I'm too soft too green I gave too many chances in the past. I was a puppet who had my strings manipulated and it wasn't until later that I cut those strings.but the pain I've endured will remain with me forever.let's face facts thats all I've ever done was survive I'm doing it now for what reason I don't know. But what I do know is my mind is breaking apart at the seems and nothing will fully fix it.