hello, What's the best way to get through to your teenager..Thank you
he thinks im dumb, wants to move out :(
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Fungirlmmm · 51-55, F
Or tell him you are going to give him a trial run of adult hood. If he has a job you could start charging him for rent, food, half all the untilities. Sit down with either your monthly bills or get a renters guide and sit down with him to figure out how much money he's going to need before he moves out. If he isn't old enough then it will be a goal and if he is old enough at least it will be a wake up call. I just read an article in my local paper saying that even newly married couples are sharing homes because they can't afford to live on their own in a more than extremely modest home... :( Sad but true.
Fungirlmmm · 51-55, F
@LindaM: Right but he is going to need a lot of money to move out. For example... Most rental places now require first and last rent and a deposit. So let's add that up.... 1st $900 bucks Last another $900 bucks and customary deposit in my area is 2 x the monthly rent so that is another $1,800. Before he is done there are other deposits to be made. He can't stay on your cell phone bill so he'll have to go prepaid or find a way to do a deposit through one of the carriers, and they have huge deposits these days.... Lets just call this one low at $200.00. So far he needs $4,000 in pocket to move out and that is before he even pays the rent and electricity bills. Speaking of electricity my nephew just went out on his own (he's fresh out of college though) and it was either find a cosignsture or $500.00 deposit. Will he live in an area with public transit or will he have a car? Even if you've already bought a car his insurance is going to be horrible because he is under 25 and on his own policy so he might want to stay near public transit because he can't drive without insurance. The public transit is 121.00 a month in my area... So let's see... We are up to $4,621 and were not even close... He's going to need a bed and other furniture..m toilet paper... Cooking items ... And good to put in his fridge. Even with a roommate it is still a lot of money to move out.
Here is the thing though... If he is old enough to move out then you can't really stop him because he is an adult... Most teens don't want to be around their family anyway. They want to hang out with their friends.
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Here is the thing though... If he is old enough to move out then you can't really stop him because he is an adult... Most teens don't want to be around their family anyway. They want to hang out with their friends.
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Fungirlmmm · 51-55, F
Okay I just read the additional information you provided to Doom. My additional thoughts are 1) you never let a child disrespect you because it just leads to more disrespect 2) let him know he's had his one free pass on smoking dope and if it is illegal in your state be willing to turn him in. You would rather know he is sitting in jail and alive than on the street dead. 3)if you have legal custody of him then there is a reason the courts made you his guardian and you need to hold on. If you do not have custody agreement then she can take him back at any time. Will she keep him though?
LindaM · 61-69, F
@Fungirlmmm: i have a legal document which states we have joint custody, his mom day and myself with the day to day care to me...his mom will take him thats not the issue, the issue is she has her own problems and i am worried about his mental and physical state...thank you for all your responses..