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If someone thanks you or apologizes and they are showing no gratitude or empathy is it still valid?

Growing up I was always taught to apologize and really mean it and I fou d either others don't apologize or they say it because they have to but they don't really care. I mean now it's gotten to the point where people do things and act like I'm too insignificant to even notice.
And if I'm honest I resent the severe punishment I endured to be "nice!".
SW User
In my personal opinion, I can see that the way we apologize is the way it reflects the meaning behind our apology. Apologizing is not an easy thing, but it not hard either. We apologize, but it depends on whether the other is willing to accept our apologies or not. The only way to know if that person is truly apologizing is that looking through their behavior, their attitude, their words when they are expressing it.

Some people are taking advantage of apologies, but they hardly know the deep meaning of it. And the most important question is, are they willing to prove that their apology is the truth? Only they can decide. :)
Peppa · 26-30, F
[@700444,Anna666] I love this. Honestly I'm always willing to accept an apology based upon its sincerity and the act of behavioral differences afterwards. It's not about control/power or knowing what's best it's about having my feelings validated and the acknowledgement that what was done has caused me upset.
SW User
[@305137,Justlilyg] Yes, indeed.
zeeva70 · F
I've learned that many people don't know what empathy even means so it's apples and oranges.
zeeva70 · F
[@305137,Justlilyg] That would be ideal, wouldn't it? Keeping the focus on you, what makes you happy, and self-care is the only way to go.
Peppa · 26-30, F
[@335166,zeeva70] I'm finally learning how to be more assertive. I've always been afraid to express myself. Hopefully that'll stop me from needing that apology and just accept, we're not the same type of people n move on
zeeva70 · F
[@305137,Justlilyg] 🥂🤗🏆️
plinkplonk · F
No.

There are people - who I live with 😒 - who do not understand the [i]simple[/i] concept that even though you do something without malice, you can still cause upset and pain. Saying sorry isn't about whether you are right or wrong - it's about acknowledging that there are hard feelings and you take responsibility for your part.
Peppa · 26-30, F
[@719213,plinkplonk] thing is we will always make mistakes and we will always step on someone's toes. Because we're interchangable, mood, situations and basic human nature of selfish needs take over but as you said Saying sorry isn't about whether you are right or wrong - it's about acknowledging that there are hard feelings and you take responsibility for your part.
There are a lot of people that don't even care enough to do that.
plinkplonk · F
[@305137,Justlilyg]

Listen, you are preaching to the choir.

I say this a million times >> Our only mission on earth is to learn and grow. WE cannot grow without making mistakes. It doesn't make you wrong, it makes you human. Saying sorry does not make you weak, it makes you a work in progress - just like the rest of us. You are not special.

LOL
Peppa · 26-30, F
[@719213,plinkplonk] well I wish I could say I've seen people grow into that thinking but they don't, well not everyone. :-/
Rutterman · 41-45, M
A sincere, heartfelt apology means a lot to me. An apology given insincerely or full of justification for one's misbehavior is worse than worthless. It would better if people said nothing at all than give an apology of that sort
Peppa · 26-30, F
[@121363,Rutterman] I feel like I'm encountering more and more people that just don't care.
Rutterman · 41-45, M
[@305137,Justlilyg] I think you might be right about people not caring so much anymore. Sign of the times.
I dont even care about apologies bc that does nothing for me.
Peppa · 26-30, F
[@25627,Selah] apologizes aren't for you when another feels slighted by you

 
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