I miss my son.

He was 8 months of age.

I wouldn't say strong. I don't know what I'd say...strong just doesn't seem to fit well.

Maybe it is because you don't see your own inner mettle. I had been told I was very strong after living through my personal hell. I didn't see it that way for a while after. But with the years has come clarity and distance, plus healing, and I now know I am pretty tough. Maybe not as tough as they say, but tough in my own way nonetheless.

And, you will always be a mom. Rather he is alive or not doesn't change that.

@PeanutsauntieP1982: I understand. Maybe I will realise it later on, even though it has already been 2 years?

I'm glad your life is better, bud.

People keep saying that, but I don't feel like a mum any longer. And I think it'd be a bit weird to answer “Yes" when asked if I have any children, when I don't physically have a child anymore.

I understand. I think in your heart though, you'll always be a mom. Once about five years ago it was Mothers Day, and my friend, who was a carhop at the place we worked, told this one old lady happy Morhers Day. The old woman smiled and said thank you, then told my friend that she'd lost her son over half a century ago as a baby, but it was so rare to be told that, that she was happy to hear it. If you have other children in the future, I can tell that they'll be very blessed to have you as their mother. I am unable to stay pregnant, so the only way I'll likely become a mom is if I marry someone with kids, or if I was to adopt. For now, I am content to be a damn good aunt, LOL! (I have two nieces, 4 years, and the other is 19 months.