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How can I really build my confidence?

Today at work I had a performance review with my manager and she was basically telling me that I'm not ready to move to the next level because i'm not assertive and lacking confidence. She said I need to step up and show her I can take charge and be a leader. I just dont think I have what it takes man...My low self esteem is DESTROYING me..my career and my life is at stake and I just DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE 😢😢😩

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SimplyTracie · 26-30, F

I don’t think your manager is considering other keys factors like compassion and loyalty. Caring and being loyal to your staff is the most important ingredient in my opinion. I think aggressiveness/assertiveness is low priority.

Confidence comes from knowing your job and your staff. It’s easy to lead if your staff respects you.

You asking for help shows you’re humble and that’s important too.

You go after what you want! Go!

Alifeinterrupted · 31-35, F

@SimplyTracie Honestly, I thought she gave a fair review because with my line of work, you have to be assertive and confident to thrive..I've seen it a lot. These managers and partners are aggressive,they just want their work done..they dont have time to comfort the weak heart. I work with clients, they want assertive folks, they will literally belittle you and walk all over you if you dont really know when to put your foot down and I think thats the main reason our company is pushing us so hard

She said she've seen where i'm not being assertive and i'm not really confident and I need to build my project management skills, which quite frankly I think is the truth.I always knew I had very low self esteem... I just never knew it would ever reach the point to where its affecting my career and its KILLING me softly now the reality has kicked in.

SimplyTracie · 26-30, F

@Alifeinterrupted Those people that needs constant motivation needs to go find another job. Those that aren’t self motivated and needs a manager to kick um in the butt should go work at McDonald’s.

If you hire good people, you just need to teach them their craft and they will bloom. My manager knows how to hire good people - he hired me. 😂😂😂