Why do I feel like I already lost my best friend and that I have noone?

I no longer can tell him everything just like before. I keep things to myself now. The hurt. The pain. "It's Okay". It has been my favorite line. A line that whenever I speak means it breaks my heart but I won't let you know. I can hear my heart shattering but I'll keep it to myself. I wouldn't tell you. You won't understand. You might not care anyway.

It's okay :)