Do you believe it's horoscopes?

@RodneyTrotter Are you sure it’s not Switzerland?

@RodneyTrotter Well whoever told me it was stinky feet and oatmeal cookies is gonna be in serious trouble.

@RodneyTrotter And here I thought we’d seen the last of my annoying relatives.

@RodneyTrotter I heard it’s not the right time to go to Belgium.

@RodneyTrotter I think this computer makes my ass look fat.

@RodneyTrotter Must be why my eyelashes are never where I can find them in the refrigerator.

@RodneyTrotter The doctor said they weren’t hemorrhoids but that’s not a bundt cake I’m sitting on back there.

@RodneyTrotter It gets unbearably hot in the summer.

@RodneyTrotter Same thing happened to me when I went bra shopping with my Aunt Gertrude and couldn’t find the piece of pie that was stuck under the living room couch.

@RodneyTrotter Do you have any idea how hard it is to shove a donkey into the back of a Volkswagen Beetle?

@RodneyTrotter The last time I had pizza, it was only because no one ever puts the toilet seat down.

@RodneyTrotter That’s what I was telling Queen Elizabeth before I got pissed because the plumber ate the last deviled egg.