If you had the overwhelming feeling that you might be murdered or you were going to be what would you do

I could see in my ex's eyes once that he wanted to kill me. We were drunk and fighting. He's 6ft2 I'm 5ft4 and I was drunk so not in the best position to defend myself violently. I saw the look in his eyes and considering my intoxication and his being taller and wider I did the first thing I could think of, looked him straight in the eyes and rubbed his cock. One of the only times me and him actually had pretty good sex and the only time I've been in real fear for my life so far and fingers crossed to avoid similar fear. Anyway everyone I know has instructions that if I'm ever in a coma or vulnerable state he's not allowed anywhere near just incase.