i want so bad to just escape and go somewhere far from here ad i just don't i will make it

i want to be a designer or something like that. my biggest dream is to live in new york and i would love to have just a normal job but i don't i can even move there i'm not rich or at least wealthy and i will never get out of my state it's a lot if i can at least move to another city. (sorry if my english is bad, it's not my first language)