my friend is so obsessive

My friend keeps pushing to be included in my social plans and I feel guilty setting boundaries

I’m looking for outside opinions because I’m starting to feel like I’m being put in a difficult position with a friend.

I have a friend who often expects to be invited whenever I’m going out with my boyfriend and his friendship group. It’s not that I never invite her, but sometimes the plans are just couples or a specific group dynamic, and I don’t think it’s unreasonable to not invite everyone every time.

Recently, another friend of mine (Rianne) likes one of the guys in my boyfriend’s friend group (Raf), so I mentioned that she wanted to meet him and maybe come out with the group sometime. My friend Natalia immediately made it about herself and said things like “so when are we all going out then?” She thought Raf might like her because he hugs her when he sees her, but I told her I had asked him and he said she wasn’t his type. She then said he might have changed his mind.

She also started saying that Rianne and Raf probably wouldn’t work anyway because Rianne might go to Turkey for a summer job and it would be long distance. It felt like she was trying to dismiss Rianne’s interest.

Later she asked if next time I went to the pub I would invite her and said something like “are you going to invite me out and not care what Kyle and Sophie think?” For context, Kyle and Sophie are a couple, and Natalia previously slept with Kyle. The one time I invited her out with the group, she told Sophie “I took an STI test after sleeping with your boyfriend,” which caused awkwardness. I explained that it wasn’t about Sophie and Kyle, but that sometimes it’s just me and my boyfriend spending time with other couples.

She then started begging me to invite her next time there was a bigger group outing. She kept saying things like “I really need it” and repeatedly asked me to swear on her life that I would invite her. I tried to change the subject and said I don’t swear on people’s lives, but she kept going and eventually I ended up swearing because I felt pressured.

The reason I’m struggling is because this isn’t the first time I’ve felt guilt-tripped by her. She can be very pushy when she wants something, and I feel like I end up giving in just to stop the conversation rather than because I actually want to.

I don’t want to be a bad friend, but I also don’t think someone is automatically entitled to be invited to every social plan just because they are my friend or because the venue is public.

Am I being unreasonable, or does this sound like my boundaries are being pushed?

she also called sophie ugly, and millie (another girl in the group who comes out with her boyfriend lewis, who she has also kissed ih the past) but switched up on them when she found out i started hanging with them socially. She wants contact access to me. She sarcastically messages me “thanks for the invite” when I go out with my boyfriend’s friend group without her. I told her before “I don’t think it’s a good idea you come out and fifth wheel” and she said “i don’t mind fifth wheeling” tje way this girl just begged me on the the phone. insanity