I Am Looking For An Online Friend
[b]Online "friends"[/b]
In my short time on this site, I've noticed a concerning trend. I have had many users contact me through private messaging and we exchange some light-hearted messages, small-talk, a couple interesting conversations.
And then, within days, they are calling me "friend", saying they like me & my company, they feel a "deep connection", gotten to know me, or that they miss me when I'm offline. All very sweet, but it does concern me.
Please be aware, you have NO IDEA who you are talking to online. And I'm not just talking about fakes. Even genuine people with no bad intentions, you don't really know who they are. It is in the very nature of online communications. You are not experiencing that person as a person, you are only reading their words (which may or may not be genuine).
A perfect example of this: a user contacted me a few days ago and we started chatting. Within a day or so, they told me I had a kind and sweet personality that was rare to find. I tried to gently point out that they did not know that about me, they just enjoyed my messages. They seemed to quickly form an attachment (saying they missed me, I brightened their day, etc) and again I warned them against too quickly forming an opinion when all they have to go by is my messages. They then accused me of being arrogant and rude and they didn't want to talk anymore. The irony is that this was exactly what I was warning them of.
I enjoy having an online chat as much as the next person. But please for the love of God don't treat it like the deepest friendship of your life. Don't assume you know that person. Don't make judgements based on a few messages. People are multi - faceted beings and it is very hard (impossible?) to gain an accurate perspective online.
Be careful, be safe, and don't get hurt. :)
In my short time on this site, I've noticed a concerning trend. I have had many users contact me through private messaging and we exchange some light-hearted messages, small-talk, a couple interesting conversations.
And then, within days, they are calling me "friend", saying they like me & my company, they feel a "deep connection", gotten to know me, or that they miss me when I'm offline. All very sweet, but it does concern me.
Please be aware, you have NO IDEA who you are talking to online. And I'm not just talking about fakes. Even genuine people with no bad intentions, you don't really know who they are. It is in the very nature of online communications. You are not experiencing that person as a person, you are only reading their words (which may or may not be genuine).
A perfect example of this: a user contacted me a few days ago and we started chatting. Within a day or so, they told me I had a kind and sweet personality that was rare to find. I tried to gently point out that they did not know that about me, they just enjoyed my messages. They seemed to quickly form an attachment (saying they missed me, I brightened their day, etc) and again I warned them against too quickly forming an opinion when all they have to go by is my messages. They then accused me of being arrogant and rude and they didn't want to talk anymore. The irony is that this was exactly what I was warning them of.
I enjoy having an online chat as much as the next person. But please for the love of God don't treat it like the deepest friendship of your life. Don't assume you know that person. Don't make judgements based on a few messages. People are multi - faceted beings and it is very hard (impossible?) to gain an accurate perspective online.
Be careful, be safe, and don't get hurt. :)
26-30, F
