What would you make of this exchange?

Friend A has crohns disease and has been struggling recently.

Friend B texts her. This is how the messages go.

B: How are you feeling?
A: Pushing on as always. How are you?
B: Great thanks. Well let's be positive, the sun is out!
A: Glad you are ok.

This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »

gmatthewb · 51-55, M

That sounds very normal unfortunately. I see on here people saying they can't understand why others tell them to cheer up when they have depression or to relax when they have anxiety. It's nice that others try to be positive, but there are ways to do it so you don't sound insensitive.

Jenni855 · 36-40, F

@gmatthewb Do you think it comes across as insensitive?

gmatthewb · 51-55, M

@Jenni855 To some it might feel that way, specifically how your example is worded. Almost sounds like friend B doesn't care that friend A is only pushing on, shows when friend A then says "glad you are ok", which leads me to feel that friend A is feeling pretty down and would like some support.

Jenni855 · 36-40, F

@gmatthewb Agreed. Friend A is me.

gmatthewb · 51-55, M

@Jenni855 I kind of thought it might have been. I have a pretty good idea of what it is like to have friends like friend B. A lot of times you just want them to stop and take a moment to really care about how you answer and be nosy and want to really know, then offer to try to help you enjoy your day a bit better.

Jenni855 · 36-40, F

@gmatthewb To me it just sounded dismissive and 'Stop being negative'. That does hurt.

gmatthewb · 51-55, M

@Jenni855 Yeah, makes you feel hurt and alone.