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Anyone have friends who have kids that are out of control, and yet cannot be away from their kids for a second?

I’m not sure how to deal with visiting a friend like this. There’s no respect for the adult interaction bc the kids are running wild and even hitting the adults. No one else says or does anything. I give them a firm NO but the parents don’t do anything and I can’t even interact with them bc of it. Nor will they be separate from the kids.

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WhateverWorks · 36-40

🤷🏻‍♀️ Hang out with them in small doses. See if you guys can hang out after the kids are in bed. Ultimately though unless they state otherwise you attempting to set boundaries different than how the parents do things won’t be appreciated and will cause a rift in the friendship

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DoubleRings · 51-55, F

@WhateverWorks right? I do feel that way. Along with a couple other transgressions I feel they should be in control of. One of them tried to hit me and cocked her fist back at me. I said “NO! we are NOT hitting. That’s NOT ok with me” kid backed off and never tried it again with me but continued with other family members and guests. These are children not animals and no one else said anything

WhateverWorks · 36-40

I hear you, but it’s also the NachoKid policy. All you can do is set a standard that they need to respect your personal boundaries @DoubleRings

DoubleRings · 51-55, F

@WhateverWorks agree.

BrokenAbyss

I had a friend like that and decided to let the friendship go. Our kids couldn’t play well because hers were so disrespectful. And I couldn’t stand to listen to her complaining about her kids in front of them but letting them do whatever they want.

I know some kids are wild, but some adults need to figure their shit out and at least try to raise good humans.

DoubleRings · 51-55, F

Agree! Now, I don’t have a ton of contact with them but when I do, I feel it’s even more important to make the most of it. Not to let it get sabotaged by a circus of feral beings. @BrokenAbyss

Iwillwait · M

That's hard. There's a slippery slope you need to stay away from. If I were in that position, I would talk with them about your concerns, away from the children, (preferably not in their home/domicile)

DoubleRings · 51-55, F

Yes. One time I gave the parents gifts in several gift bags and the kids had everything swiftly unwrapped @Iwillwait and thrown on the floor before their parents could even locate the card that came with it. I was so mad. It wasn’t for the kids to open.

Iwillwait · M

@DoubleRings Yes, that's tough.

meggie · F

My sister-in-law flew into a rage when I told her she could come but to leave the kids at home. The kids would eat everything including any unoffered food in the fridge and run wild.

DoubleRings · 51-55, F

You’re brave to stand your ground! What ever happened in the end? Did they come? @meggie

meggie · F

@DoubleRings only once without the kids as they wanted to borrow money

DoubleRings · 51-55, F

@meggie OMG talk about adding another layer - did they convince you?

littlepuppywantanewlife · 31-35, M

My aunt had horrible kids. She had five of them and it was horror when she came to live with us for atleast a month.

DoubleRings · 51-55, F

I can’t imagine! Forget that ! @littlepuppywantanewlife

Jenny1234 · 51-55, F

I have never had a friend with kids like that tbh

DoubleRings · 51-55, F

@Jenny1234 good! Thankfully I don’t see them often.

SkeetSkeet · 100+, F

Get new friends

Pretzel · 61-69, M

@SkeetSkeet or buy them new kids

V00doo

Yeah, hard for the teacher in me to not tick off in situations like that.

DoubleRings · 51-55, F

Same!!! @V00doo

V00doo

@DoubleRings It's tough. I have used the voice once in a while.

DoubleRings · 51-55, F

The kids know better than to try anything stupid with me personally but it doesn’t stop the circus all around me with everyone else. @V00doo personally I’m not afraid to tell them NO especially when to permit them affects me personally. NO, you will not hit me. That’s a hard NO.

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