Contacted Uber and DoorDash Support
Seems that for the former, there's nothing wrong with my account that's actively blocking me from receiving delivery requests; for the latter, there was and they allowed me to schedule ahead of time for my area for today, and promised to let me schedule ahead of time permanently. It's still up to me to get mobile data, insulator bag, and put in the work/strategy to make what little (or decent) money I can from being a food courier, especially when the algorithms are against cyclists and favour drivers.