A question for the Americans

How dare you?

No, I'm joking, that's not it. I am having my nightly bowl of cereal (why does it taste much better at night than in the morning?) and I found myself wondering 'what actually is oatmeal'? Is it what everyone else calls porridge (an actual 'meal' of oats)?

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Human1000 · 51-55, M

For some reason this dude from a religious sect called the Quakers invented and owns all oatmeal.

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SomeMichGuy · M

@Human1000 It was part of the Armistice signed at the end of the Great Grain Wars, which gave oats to the Quaker, rice to Uncle Ben, and shredded wheat...well, no one cared about that, so Nabisco quietly absconded with it.

(It is said that the Frito Bandito took advantage of that War to claim corn chips for himself, but he claims that this is an unfounded and scandalous rumor.)