Just met someone that looks exactly like my dad when he was younger.

He used to be happy - i feel like he wasnt happy in the end.

I work hard everyday to make sure my kids dont remember me like that. Which is.. hiding sadness. He hid it .. i didnt see it then. I was very selfish and sometimes still am. But now that i look back at it.. i could see he wasnt happy and had his internal struggles..

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PepsiColaP

I'm sorry for your loss .
If I can offer anything I'd ask you allow yourself to be vulnerable around your family.

BrandNewMan · M

Seems this is based on your impressions /assumptions, if he never shared personally how he felt and why. How did him hiding his sadness (if accurate) affect you at the time .. Did he treat you poorly? Was he not there for you as father should be?

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BrandNewMan · M

@HeadAboveWater So the remembering him this way seems on you more than him ..

Sorry he is gone fron your life. Just hope some current day impressions aren't unduly altering the memory of who he was as a father.

HeadAboveWater · 31-35, M

@BrandNewMan definitely not like that - i still respect him and appreciate everything he was and I understand why he did what he did. He loved us, his family, so much that he endured it all.

At the the end of the day we were worth it for him.

I just wish he knew he didnt feel like he needed to internalize it all. Its more of a short coming of me, my mother and siblings tbh.

BrandNewMan · M

@HeadAboveWater I see ..

Iwillwait · M

Sorry for your loss.

HeadAboveWater · 31-35, M

@Iwillwait thank you

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