Verbally and emotionally abusive PARENTS. Let’s talk about it?

@Carissimi I can relate to your comment on all levels. I’m still healing. My mom is a narcissist and thank god I realized it, if it weren’t
For the many YouTube videos from psychologist who helped me spot
The signs, I wouldn’t know.

A lot of behavior I assumed
Was “normal” from a mother, really wasnt. The yelling, the belittling, the name calling simply because a mistake was made, the hitting and punching because I received a bad report card, or maybe..maybe broke curfew... I got my @ss beat for the silliest of things.

Til this day depending on her mood, she talks to me like sh*t, while I praise the ground she walks on and
Rave about “how great of a mother shit is”... I usually leave out the bad stuff...

@Mrowe718 You're pretty kind for still taking the high road. One day, your healing may require a different path...

@tj78610 we were taught that we can’t speak badly about our parents because “they brought us in and can take us out”. I’m pretty sure that’s the only reason I don’t talk bad about her, but there’s a lot of things I strongly dislike about her. She has a dark energy and I used to wonder a lot why living in her household made me absolutely miserable.

She would use the fact that I lived with her as leverage. At any chance she could mention it out of anger “you’re in MY house and can gtfo
If you don’t like what I’m saying”. She loved to threaten to put me out. And the next day would act as if nothing happened. Trying to be nice, knowing that I was still upset from
The night before. It’s a weird, emotionally abusive thing narcissistic parents do, to keep their children “loving” them. It’s like she needed to be needed.

[b][i][c=#BF0080]What different path may you suggest? [/c][/i][/b]

@Mrowe718 I'm [b]not[/b] a counselor, and I have just bits of info about you, so I'm hesitant to say - but I think based on that scenario, you might want to consider if having her in your life at all isn't worse than the alternative now?

Only you can know that. My parents have earned a place in my adulthood, and by extension, in my kids lives. I think it possible you should maybe demand your mom earn that too.

Easy for me to sit here and say, I know...

@tj78610 I see. So, in other words, [i][c=#BF0080]distance[/c][/i]?

@Mrowe718 Yes. Whether actual distance or just saying "I don't want to be around you much". The latter would be a difficult conversation.

Either way, she's ruined your childhood, don't let her ruin your adult years too. You have control now!

I’m very sorry you had to endure this. I relate to it all, except I didn’t find out she was a narcissist until my late 50s. There was no internet back then. I thought it was my fault, that there was something wrong with me, that I couldn’t be loved. I spent my whole young life trying to be “good,” although I [i]was[/i] a good child already, but nothing I did would stop her abuse. She went further than abuse, she tries to destroy every relationship I have with other people. She will ruin your reputation if you don’t kowtow to her ideas. A very wicked woman, and my arch nemesis. Mrowe718.